(obligatory photo of Natalie)
When people I've just met, or people I've known forever, learn that I run, the first question they always ask is: Why? (Or: Is somebody chasing you? I've got a sense of humor, but it really only goes so far, people.)
The short answer is: I'm not sure. The other short answer is: For lots of reasons, most of them unbeknownst even to me.
Truth be told, I fell in love with running long before I even I knew it. Back in those days, I was convinced that my abilities extended only so far as the distance that covered about 25 feet on the approach to a high jump mat or a long jump pit. On a good day, it was a 400 meter leg of a relay. I can specifically recall thinking that the 1.5 mile run that we had to do as part of the tryout for the soccer team in high school was at best described as some form of torture, an unfairly subhuman exercise to weed out those of us who really couldn't hack it. I always came huffing across the finish line about 9 seconds under the allotted time, which I think was probably something ridiculous like 17 minutes.
But, for whatever reason, over the years, I have felt compelled to add more and more miles to my runs. My favorite distance today is 15 miles. Bizarre, right? A lot of runners might tell you that the reason they run marathons or half marathons is because they are crazy. Maybe. My theory is that runners sign up for those races to feel less crazy. Only a person who has endured the months of training and the emotional highs and lows of race day can truly appreciate what another runner is experiencing. And races always seem to occur at a point in training when one wonders just why it is that they set out to achieve such a feat in the first place. So, perfect that you can show up somewhere and be surrounded by a few thousand others who had the same hair brained drive that you did.
I've run my fair share of races over the years, and have received a fair amount of skeptical questioning for pretty much every one. But none so much as the race I ran 2 days ago. I'll admit, it did seem like a better idea in December when I initially registered. Support or attempts to disuade, it made no difference. I was determined all the same. When I toed the line for the start, I was much less certain of the outcome than I generally am, and maybe that's because in addition to having spotty training for most of February and all of March, I was nearly 17 weeks pregnant. That's right, readers, in case you didn't already know, baby #2 is set to make an appearance in October.
I had a plan though, and backed by the assurance (and reassurance) from my doctors that running while pregnant is perfectly safe so long as a few simple precautions are taken, I went ahead full steam. And, you know what? I finished. Sure, my time was almost 40 minutes off my personal best, but that's not what Sunday was about. (Speaking of, the second most frequently asked question I get is: Do you think you will win? If you have ever asked me this seriously, and I laughed out loud, I apologize. I would say that in any given marathon or half marathon field, there are maybe only 20 people, 25 tops, who seriously and honestly believe that they have a shot at winning. The other 4,920 of us run to prove that we can do it, to beat our own personal record, or whatever other reason, but certainly not to win or even compete for a top spot. Odd, I suppose. I mean, I guess no baseball player ever steps up to bat and says, I just want to finish these 9 innings, and I'll be happy. In other sports, the object is victory.)
Anyway. Being a "runner" is part of my identity, just as is being a wife, a mom, a daughter, and sister, social worker, an average cook, an obsessive organizer, and the list goes on. I wanted to run to prove to myself that I could finish what I started, to set a positive example for my daughter. I do not believe pregnancy is a disability, or a pass to sit on the couch for 10 months (that's right, 10!). Research abounds on the fact that active pregnant moms have healthier kids. And, I guess, the other reason was, why not? What did I have to lose by trying? Nothing. It's a lesson that I drive home at the end of each long run, and the impact is never any less. If I can do THIS, what else can I do?
I challenge you all to do what you love, to go beyond what you think is possible. You CAN do it.